Now an SoB isn’t what you’re thinking. Am I a son of a bitch? Depending on whom you ask that can go from a “No” to a resounding “Yes.”
A SoB is a special breed of person. Each one is different. Each one has their own story. This is mine.
Kevin McClay writes on Twitter, “When I joined in 2007, we were a group with the goal of getting our team. The day the announcement was made was a very special day for all of us.”
The Sons of Ben are different. We’ve been called a soccer firm. We’ve been called hooligans.
Andy Sherlock on Twitter writes, “It’s a family. I know I can go to any other SoB and they’d be there for me.”
This family has had my back since day one since I joined in 2007.
For the first nine years of my life I grew up a typical redneck. There were nine of us living in a two bedroom apartment. My cousin slept on a couch and I shared a bed with my grandmother. My uncle was a member of the KKK and a Nazi group.
In my life I’ve seen how truly destructive the KKK and racism can be. I’ve been to KKK rallies and cross burnings. I’ve seen them beat up blacks for simply being black. I’ve been kidnapped and scared to death for weeks. I’ve been molested. I’ve seen my birth mom die. I’ve flown out of a car, off a bridge and landed onto railroad tracks without a scratch. All of this before I even turned 10.
In all I still give a middle finger to it all. I hung with the black kids to piss my uncle off. I routinely got my ass beat for this. I was told to call my Uncle dad. I called him John that infuriated him even more and I was beaten for that as well.
I was born to be a SoB.
Ajax footballer John Cruyff once said, “Every disadvantage has got its advantage.”
I’ve never known how to feel emotion. I can assimilate into any situation and fake how I feel and with over 20 years of experience I have mastered this acting gig. It came in handy when trying to get out of situations but in terms of relationships it was a curse.
In a sense my entire life is one gigantic lie.
My adopted mother, Janet, has said this many times, “All I’ve ever wanted was for you to show emotion that is yours. I actually want you to cuss me out.”
On game day something snaps and I turn into a different person. The 20+ years of faked emotion goes away and I just let go. Not in a violent on these days but instead pride, joy and sheer happiness.
McClay continues, “The vacation from life we all give to each other by going crazy on match day.”
These days are my therapy sessions.
If someone does see me angry, upset or happy it is a rare occurrence and even then I typically fake my feelings. Being a floating blob basically living was practically worthless; yet, I’m a stubborn ass.
“There’s one vagina in the room. OOOO There’s one Vagina. Oooo There’s one Vagina OOOO There’s one Vagina in the room.” Travis Rego belts as his girlfriend walks into the room. Travis looks like he came straight out of the movie Braveheart, flaming red hair and kilt to boot. This is my first Sons of Ben event.
Off the bat I’m hooked.
Chanting and screaming at a TV set for a USA National Men’s game it was the most obscure thing I have ever witnessed. I’ve always been interested in people and how they act to hopefully learn how I should act. This apparently seemed like a good place to learn.
Tommy Roe isn’t your stereotypical accountant. His balding head is the only physical sign that he crunches numbers all day. Being the first to introduce you to the rest of the group, Tommy makes you feel at home. Easily the most outgoing accountant I know. Even if you don’t understand soccer he explains to you the rules; even if you don’t care.
“I’ve never struck a ball out of anger.” Odd start to a quote as Tommy Roe pauses to carefully take a sip of his Guinness, “but this game can bring people together like no other game in the world, it’s beautiful.”
Tommy continues on how his first ever match he watched was during the 1994 World Cup held here in America. He watched a match with people from two countries that should hate each other, but here, over soccer and a pint, they were able to join together and have a laugh.
This is what brought me into the unique and bizarre world of soccer; the brotherhood.
It’s ironic that the place I would feel the best is where everyone conforms into a single entity. Acting as a single group I learned to break free of the emotional wall I built over the years. With this I had to learn how to control these feelings – something I have until recently struggled doing.
Recently I have lost many friends and my family but for the family and friends I have gained within the Sons of Ben it was worth it all. I have never met a group of people who understand and support me like my SoB family. I would do anything for these people and I know they would do anything for me, because, well, I have seen them do it. You attack my family I will protect them anyway I can.
It’s not all soccer for us. We are more than that. People tend to forget we raised $10,000 for a food shelter in Chester. After every tailgate we donate all the leftover food to the local food shelter. We’ve thrown surprise parties for other members, going away parties, celebrate each other’s good times and are there to pick them up during their tough times.
No matter what I have been through in my life you will never hear me complain, people have gone through worst. I am actually grateful for the things that have happened to me in my life. If not for these events I would be a different man then I am today.
To my family; I love you guys and thank you for everything. Ad Finem Fidelis